The Perfectionism Trap: What “The Substance” Reveals About Our Relentless Pursuit of More
Have you ever felt like no matter how much you achieve, it’s never enough? Like you’re constantly chasing some impossible version of yourself? The drive to be perfect is relentless, woven into every part of our lives—how we look, what we accomplish, and how well we juggle work, relationships, and responsibilities. Society amplifies these pressures, pushing an endless pursuit of self-improvement, productivity, and relevance.
Perfectionists are especially vulnerable, setting ever-higher goals, only to find that no achievement brings lasting peace. It’s an exhausting hamster wheel, fueled by the illusion that doing more, being more, will finally make them feel worthy. But perfectionism isn’t just personal—it’s cultural, embodied by figures like Harvey, the studio executive in The Substance, who sees Elizabeth Sparkle’s worth solely through the lens of her marketability. This reflects a societal tendency to reduce people to their perceived value, often based on superficial measures like beauty and youth.
This theme is powerfully explored in The Substance, a film that serves as a dark allegory for the impossible demands of perfectionism. It tells the story of fitness celebrity Elizabeth Sparkle as she battles the ultimate foe: aging. (Spoiler alert!) Having built her career on youth, beauty, and performance, Elizabeth cannot accept her own mortality or offer herself the self-compassion necessary to process her grief. Instead, she turns to a dangerous drug that creates a younger version of herself—Sue—who quickly becomes the next fitness sensation. But Sue is more than just a second chance; she is the embodiment of Elizabeth’s desire to be “perfect.” And just as social pressures constantly whisper that we must be more—more successful, more attractive, more accomplished—Sue grows stronger, more demanding, and ultimately, more dangerous. She personifies the relentless voice of perfectionism that never allows rest and never grants peace.
By exploring The Substance, we can break down how perfectionism manifests in our culture and personal lives, and most importantly, how to harness its motivation without falling into its trap.
The Roots of Perfectionism
At its core, perfectionism is the internalized belief that your worth is tied to achievement. It often stems from early life experiences—having to grow up too quickly due to trauma, receiving love and validation only when excelling, or being criticized for any failure. These experiences plant the fear that, without perfection, you are not lovable, not valuable, not enough.
This fear fuels the inner critic—that persistent voice urging you to do better, pushing you harder with the promise that once you achieve this, you will finally be worthy. But the real message beneath the critic’s drive is far darker: You are never enough. Perfectionism is a survival strategy, one that may have served you at some point, but eventually, it turns into a ruthless master. And like Elizabeth Sparkle, when faced with an inevitable limitation—be it age, failure, or rejection—you may find yourself at a breaking point.
The Substance as a Metaphor for Perfectionism
Harvey, the studio executive in The Substance, embodies the societal pressures that fuel perfectionism. He represents the deeply ingrained sexism and ageism that still pervade industries and culture at large. In one of the film’s most memorable scenes, Harvey slurps down shrimp in a grotesque manner while telling Elizabeth her career is over because she’s too “Jurassic,” completely apathetic to the impact. This moment reflects the ugly reality of how deeply society’s standards shape our sense of worth, especially for women, whose value is often measured by their youth and appearance far more than men’s.
Elizabeth Sparkle is the quintessential perfectionist. Her entire identity is built on a hustle-and-grind, girlboss mentality. Her success has reinforced her belief that perfection is the key to being valued and loved. But when her career declines due to factors beyond her control, she is faced with a choice that all perfectionists eventually encounter: confront the fear of worthlessness lurking beneath her drive, or double down and try even harder to outrun it. She chooses the latter.
Enter Sue, her younger, "better" self. Sue represents the perfectionist's fantasy—the ultimate achievement, the version of herself that is flawless and untouchable. But, like the inner critic, Sue is merciless. She sees Elizabeth as weak, obsolete, and ultimately disposable. And this is where the horror of The Substance becomes painfully real: unchecked perfectionism does not lead to fulfillment; it turns against you, convincing you that anything less than perfection is failure.
Self-Compassion: The Antidote to Perfectionism
In The Substance, Elizabeth has a potential lifeline in Fred, an old high school friend who admires her for more than just her success. But she pushes him away, unable to reconcile his affection with her own self-loathing. This mirrors the struggle perfectionists face when encountering self-compassion. The idea that they could be worthy just as they are feels alien, even threatening.
Perfectionism thrives in a culture that rewards overachievement, but real healing begins when we recognize that worth is not something we earn. Therapy can be a crucial space to untangle these beliefs, to practice sitting with imperfection without shame, and to develop a relationship with ourselves that isn’t dictated by performance.
Rewiring Your Brain: How Therapy Breaks the Perfectionism Cycle
Perfectionism isn’t something you can simply turn off. It is deeply wired into the way you see yourself and the world. But therapy can help you:
Notice Societal Expectations and Pressures: External forces shape how we view ourselves. Therapy helps you dissect these influences and explore how they’ve contributed to your perfectionistic tendencies.
Identify Your Inner Critic: Whether it’s procrastination, harsh self-judgment, or an inability to enjoy success, therapy can help you recognize how perfectionism manifests in your life.
Understand the Fear Beneath It: Beneath perfectionism is often a fear of rejection, failure, or being unlovable. Therapy provides a space to explore these fears with curiosity rather than judgment.
Cultivate Self-Compassion: Therapy helps you develop a kinder, more forgiving relationship with yourself. This doesn’t mean giving up ambition—it means allowing yourself to be human in the process.
Challenge Perfectionist Thinking: A therapist can help you recognize cognitive distortions—such as all-or-nothing thinking—and replace them with more balanced perspectives.
Learn to Sit with Discomfort: Much of perfectionism is about avoiding the discomfort of imperfection. Therapy teaches you how to tolerate uncertainty and self-doubt without needing to fix or control everything.
Breaking Free from the Cycle
So, how do you break free from the perfectionism trap? The first step is noticing when you’re on the hamster wheel—when you’re pushing yourself relentlessly, when achievements feel hollow, when your inner critic is in overdrive. Instead of reaching for the next pursuit or trying to silence the discomfort, pause. Ask yourself: What am I afraid of? What am I grieving? What do I need right now?
Perfectionism is seductive because it offers control. But real fulfillment comes from embracing the messiness of being human. Therapy provides a space to practice this—to learn that you are enough, not because you are perfect, but because you exist.
Elizabeth’s tragedy was that she believed she had to keep striving to be worthy. But you don’t have to make the same mistake. The real work isn't in becoming perfect—it’s in embracing the imperfections that make us human and learning to feel worthy in the process. If you recognize yourself in these patterns, therapy can offer a way out—not by making you work harder, but by helping you find peace in simply being.